So will you finally surrender? Or are you still suffering?
I’ve been thinking. Suffering is a product of my brain, my thoughts are rolled into an idea and because the Ego wants to protect itself at all costs, it projects suffering because that is how it can survive. It needs something to occupy my mind, which keeps it in the centre all day long.
Suffering, which is the illusion of fear, is the perfect game for this. For a moment, I considered the possibility that I would play the game of surrender and be what I am. After all, what could it be? After all, anything that can happen, including the destruction of my body, will not change my essential nature.
Anything that can be a manifestation of my existence. That central core, that which cannot even be consciously named or felt, cannot be changed by any circumstance.
Then I began to observe myself, to observe, or rather to contemplate. I caught the Ego with all its capital letters shivering like a frightened child in a corner of the inner room. I felt a little sorry for him, to tell you the truth. The Ego is afraid of dying. The Ego, what tries to convince me that everything must be kept under control and put in order.
The surrender of what is truly Existent, call it God, the Universe, whatever, fills the Ego with dread because it causes its death. I wondered how many true moments in my life I have missed because it didn’t want to die and I ran away from surrender instead.
Slipping out of the palm of God’s hand, jumping headlong into missing my own life. Many times.
How many times do we run away from the fluffy-soft perfect feeling that clearly marks out the right path and choose instead to clutch, reel, just because the Ego wants to live at any cost and doesn’t give a damn if it causes suffering.
– So you’re finally surrendering? – I heard the question again
– Yes, I am. I surrender. After all, what can happen?
Nothing.
Nothing will be just perfect.
Berni
Excerpt from The One – The Book of Life, Death and Rebirth
Photo by Kinga Cichewicz on Unsplash
No. You don’t need to learn anything new.
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